How to be more Confident Socially

A small word that brings up many emotions and memories with it. Your meaning of self-expression could be totally different from mine. Maybe, you remember that one embarrassing time that you tried to find different ways to express yourself through finding a hobby. Or maybe a time where you tried to get your ideas across and it Just didn’t work.

Well, I’ll tell you something and listen read well. I have five important rules when it comes down to expressing yourself.

  1. “There is no practice in glory, but without practice, there is no glory”

This is one of my favorite quotes. I’m not sure who said it but whoever did, worded it well. Although this quote was aimed at one of my favorite sports; Volleyball, it also applies to this situation. If you want to get better at talking to people PRACTICE! I don’t care if you stand in front of a mirror and try twenty different one liners. I don’t care if you memorize questions, heck for all I care you could have a tea party with your stuffed animals! Eh emm… anyway back to the point. You know those people who seem like they have the world made for them? Those people that have loads of friends and have amazing social skills? I’m going to tell you a secret. They practice every single day when they’re with their friends, watching movies anything. They might not notice but they are and so are you.

  1. Be comfortable with who you are and except that no one is perfect.

How can you express yourself if you don’t know who you are? How can you be confident without first feeling comfortable about who you are? I’ll tell you one thing, you can’t be. Ok hands down, I’m going to tell you now. We’re going to do some soul searching. Take a pad of paper… sure you have one? At the very top write, Me. Then write sub topics, hobbies, interests, personality and comfort level. Under these subtopics write down what your hobbies are, what interests you, what you think your personality is and how comfortable you feel with yourself. This is just for you and you alone so you can write down whatever you want to. Just remember to be honest about yourself, don’t write what you want to be or what you wish you were. Writed down the truth, be honest. Now that you have the list look at it and consider if you really feel comfortable with this list. No one is perfect so no matter how bad you think this list is, this is you right now. Remember you can always improve yourself so it’s fine you’re still learning and there’s always room for change. Try to feel comfortable about these facts about yourself and just accept them.

  1. Stop thinking you’re a horrible person.

This one is especially important because it’s a vicious cycle. Once you get into a habit of talking yourself down it’ll become routine. Never compare yourself to other people because you’ll never be exactly like them. Instead learn from these people and try to incorporate things from them that you like.

  1. Find a Hobby

If you already have a hobby you can skip this step but if you don’t, read on. I don’t care what kind of hobby you choose instrument, painting, photoshop, learning another language or even doing a sport. Hobbies help us build who we are and when we talk with other people it’s nice to say “Yeah, I like to play piano and sometimes I go to Tae Kwan do.” Instead of, “Yeah… I don’t really do anything in my spare time…” It also gives you something to talk about and maybe find a common interest with someone.

 

  1. Hang out with fellow human beings

This helps build connections and you’ll also see how other people react in social settings. It’s important to have alone time but it’s also important to have time with other people. You don’t want to close yourself off from human contact because you’re isolating one of your most important skills as a human. Conversation. It doesn’t matter if you’re just listening it’s ok you’ll get the hang of it soon enough. Or… Oh? If you don’t have any friends? That’s ok. Try looking for a local club or go people watching. Just sit in a park and observe the world around you.
Hope these tips helped!! Make sure to comment if you have any other thoughts! Oh and by the way these tips are just tips and you don’t have to follow them but I have and it’s improved my confidence quite a bit.

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